I recently delivered a message on how Jesus modeled masculinity. As I reflected on that talk, I realized similar parallels apply to leadership. Jesus lived within these tensions during the three years He established our Faith. Although fully God in every way, He lived as a human in every way as well, yet was without sin. He perfectly balanced each of these qualities below that appear as opposites.

As you read these five tensions, ask yourself which ones reflect your strengths and which ones need strengthening.

Power and Compassion

• Jesus showed great power and guts when he turned over the tables of the moneychangers in the Temple (Matt 21). He also showed his commanding power when He called the religious leaders whitewashed tombs. (Matt 23.37)
• Yet he touched the lepers, showed tenderness to the woman with an issue of blood, and showed compassion to the rich young ruler who wouldn’t give up his riches.

Head (intellect) and Heart (emotion)

• He amazed the people with his grasp of the Scriptures at age 12 while in the Temple. His arguments and logic silenced even the most brilliant of his day. He even tongue-tied the Roman procurator, Pontius Pilate. He created ingenious intellectual dilemmas for his adversaries. He masterfully used Scripture in the context of life with allusions and questions that made others think.
• Yet Jesus deeply loved people at levels that they emotionally felt. The shortest verse in the Bible even says that, “Jesus wept.” (John 11.35)

Present and Future

• Jesus approached people where they were. He didn’t ask broken people questions like, “How in the world did you let yourself get into such a jam?” He was a realist about human frailty.
• Yet, he didn’t want people to stay where they were. He told Zacchaeus the tax collector to make restitution. He accepted him where he was, but He urged him to move forward into the future in a God honoring way. Jesus lived with a perfect blend of experiencing the present with an eye toward His future and toward helping others move into their future in the best way.

Purpose and Freedom

• Jesus knew why he had come, to do His father’s will. “My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work. (John 4.34) He was bothered when the disciples didn't take his mission seriously. He was passionate about his work. He knew what needed to be done and did it. He worked hard.
• Yet he lived with an amazing sense of balance. He was never in a hurry, compulsive, and never forced people to do what He wanted them to do. He gave them freedom to choose. He said followership was voluntary, no arm-twisting or guilt motivation. He didn't force his agenda on others. He knew his purpose and knew if others would embrace His purpose for them it would be best for them. Yet he released them to make their own choices.

Strength and Sensitivity (especially toward women)

• On the sensitivity side, Jesus elevated the status of woman so high that he even praised a woman for what was a purely a masculine role, sitting at the feet of a Rabbi (when Mary sat at his feet). Jesus accepted financial support from woman. He even defended a woman caught in adultery not to approve her adultery, but to expose the injustice of her accusers.
• Yet he was forceful. He was blunt with his mother when she was out of line to ask Him to do some things not a part of His messianic plan. He affirmed Mary's role when he indirectly confronted Martha’s compulsiveness. In John 4 He candidly pointed out to the woman at the well that she had 5 husbands. Jesus knew when to be sensitive with women and when He needed to be strong and not back down.

I believe pastors and leaders, too, must live within these tensions.

• Which of these is your greatest strength?
• Which is your greatest weakness?
• What would you add to this list?

“I just learned 5 leadership tensions in Jesus’ life that apply to spiritual leadership.”(click here to tweet this quote) 

Related posts:

• 3 Ways to Defeat Leadership Discouragement 
• Stack Your Teams with you BFF’s?  

I love dogs. We’ve owned as many as four. Two currently make their home with us. Lulu (on the left) is a combination of a cat, a rat, and a dog. She’s as quick as a cat and looks like a hybrid rat-dog. She was a stray when we took her in “for just a few days until we find her owner.” We became the owners.

On the other hand, P-nut is our registered Chihuahua. He’s the oldest. He’s missing most of his teeth. And sometimes his lip gets stuck on his remaining molars so that he sports an Elvis look (no kidding).

When I reflect about our relationship with our dogs, I’m learning these five lessons from them that apply to me as a pastor or to any leader.

• Consistent: They are pretty much the same day in and day out. They don’t get moody. They’re not angry one minute and kind the next. They “show up” the same way every time I come home: they are glad to see me.
  • Leaders should be consistent with their followers. Your followers and/or staff shouldn’t have to wonder who’s going to show up each day. They shouldn’t have to wonder if you’ll be in a good mood or a bad mood.

• Grateful: When I give them a treat, they are always glad to get it. Their tails wag, their body shakes with glee, and they truly appreciate that chicken sliver or doggie biscuit I toss them.
  • Leaders should be the most grateful people in every church, ministry, or organization. After all, we get the privilege of leading and influencing others toward a cause greater than ourselves. God puts leaders in places of leadership and when He does, gratefulness to Him should fill our hearts.

• Baggage laden: This one may seem odd, but it’s true. When we picked up Lulu off the streets while we lived in California, we had no idea when or where she was born. All we knew was that she was skittish and skinny. We loved her, yet I can still simply raise my hand and she cowers. Apparently her prior owners beat her.
  • Every leader carries his or her own baggage. We don’t emerge from childhood without some broken places. Healthy leaders aren’t afraid to discover their broken places. When they do become self-aware of them, they seek help to repair them and realize that God can redeem them for good.

• Content: Both P-nut and Lulu model contentment. I don’t believe they have a worry in the world. I believe they know that all their needs will be met. So, they don’t fret about where their next meal or comfy blanket will come from (they have several).
  • Leaders trust the Lord that He will provide, care for, and guide them in any circumstance. Hebrews 13.5 reminds us that … “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

• Restful: Both dogs know how to rest. In fact, they take multiple naps every day. When they get tired, they sleep.
  • Good leaders know and practice Sabbath rhythms. While they certainly work hard, they also get enough sleep, they take days off, they take vacations, and they quiet their souls before the Lord daily. As one friend often said we must, “Divert daily. Withdraw weekly. Abandon annually.”

If you have a dog, what lessons have you learned from it?

“I just learned 5 leadership lessons that a dog can teach us.” (tweet this quote by clicking here) 

Related posts:

• 8 Indicators your ministry may be drowning you  
• What do toilet repairs and leadership composure have in common? 

I must confess upfront that I don’t play golf. I’ve only played it once, unless you count dinosaur carpet golf our family often played while on vacation. However, several years ago my father-in-law tried to interest me in the sport. He gave me a set of nice used clubs. But, I never used them. Three years later he asked me how my game was going. Chagrined, I had to admit that I never played with them. He asked me to give them back to him (he really did).

Although I don’t play the game, I know a few key terms such as birdie, bogey, and par. A golfer scores a birdie when he sinks the ball in one less stroke than par. He scores a bogie when he sinks it one stroke over par.

So what do birdies and bogies have to do with leadership?

They provide a compelling visual metaphor for how some leaders miss great opportunities (birdies) because they act like bogey leaders. Researchers at the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania analyzed over 2.5 million putts from the top 20 golfers on the PGA tour in 2007 and made a surprising discovery.[1] Prompted by fear of a ‘bogey,’ these golfers often played it safe in tournaments. Their fear resulted in an average one-stroke loss per 72-hole tournament with a combined annual loss of $1.2 million in potential prize money. “The agony of a bogey seem(ed) to outweigh the thrill of a birdie.”[2]

This dynamic, called loss or risk aversion, occurs when fear of loss stifles our attempts at gain. As a result, that fear can cause us to miss opportunities because we lead (or golf) too conservatively. In fact, our brains seem to be wired this way. Two thirds of the cells in the fight-flight structures of our brain (the amygdala) are wired to look for potential bad news. Personal experience tells us that we tend to more easily remember bad things than good. And we more quickly form bad impressions of others than good ones. Unfortunately, some leaders give in to this tendency too easily and make leadership decisions to avoid loss instead of achieving gain.

So what can a leader do to minimize risk aversion?

I suggest what I call the 3-C approach to minimize it: counsel, certainty, and confidence.

• Counsel: seek it. When you feel you’re about to play it safe when faced with an important decision, seek counsel from wise people. You might choose your staff, your board, a close friend, or a coach. Often input from an objective person can give us what we need to pull the trigger, or not. The writer of Proverbs encourages us to do this. Plans go wrong for lack of advice; many advisers bring success. (Prov 15.22, NLT)

• Certainty: get it. Our brains love certainty.[3] We want to know what lies just around the corner. But often we have no control over the future. Every decision brings with it some uncertainty because we can’t guarantee most outcomes. In response to uncertainty, the flight-fight part of our brain secretes chemicals that prompt the fear emotion, a big de-motivator. That’s where faith must come in. Faith is essentially confidence in the One who is most certain, God Himself. To overcome this fear prompted by the uncertainty of decision-making, we must place our confidence in the one thing we can be sure of, God’s faithfulness. He’ll give us that extra boost of certainty we need to make the decision.

• Courage: live it. Courage counters fear. It doesn’t remove it. When fear rises before a decision, perhaps it’s a sign that we’re on the right track. Mark Twain said it well when he wrote, “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear. John Wayne, the venerable cowboy of cowboys offers great advice when fear prompts us to avoid a reasonable risk, “Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up anyway.”

So the next time you face a leadership decision and fear attempts to derail you, consider what you could lose if you don’t move forward and saddle up anyway. Don’t bogey your decision. Birdie it instead.

How would you describe most of the leaders you know, bogie or birdie leaders?

Related Posts:

• What do Toilet Repairs and Leadership Have in Common 
• Three Probing Questions Every Leader should Ask Every Year 

You’ve been wrestling with a ministry challenge and you believe you’ve found the right answer. At the next elder meeting you share your idea and one elder begins to voice opposition. Because you feel so strongly that you’re right you begin to raise your voice, talk faster, and talk over others who want to engage in the conversation. Tension escalates. Anger rises. You think, “How dare they think I’m wrong. I know I’m right.”

What happened?

And what should a leader do?

If this has ever happened to you, a small almond shaped structure called the amygdala has hijacked your brain. Located deep inside our brains, it (there are actually two of them) causes our fight-fight-freeze-appease response to danger.

So when you felt threatened from the elder’s pushback, your emotional side took over. And when that happened, the part of our brain that helps you think clearly, respond wisely, and listen carefully, the prefrontal cortex right behind your forehead, got shut down. You reacted emotionally rather than thoughtfully. And when you got too pushy, you probably put the other elder’s brains in the same fight-fight-freeze-appease mode which increased their resistance to your idea.

Unfortunately, many pastors and leaders get stuck in this unhealthy mode. They are driven to be right, to avoid appearing wrong, or to appease others. As a result, too much of the stress hormone, cortisol, courses through their bodies and brains and puts them in a state of chronic stress. Too much cortisol over long periods of time harms our hearts, decreases our creativity and memory, and actually kills brain cells.

When that happens, what can we do?

• Evaluate whether or not you are under chronic stress. If you often feel anxious, react easily, people-please too much, or have difficulty concentrating, your amygdala may be controlling you instead of the Holy Spirit. Your body may be telling you that you need a cortisol break. Ask a close friend or a counselor to help you determine if you’re under chronic stress. Even better, ask him if he feels like always need to be right. Of course, you may not even need anyone to tell you that. You may already know it. A good dose of self-honesty will go a long way toward healing. If you are under chronic stress, create a plan to lessen your stress.

• Remind yourself that God is in control. When the brain experiences uncertainty, (i.e., Will the elders approve my idea?) it feels threatened. When we feel threatened, our emotional side driven by the amygdala tends to take over. Yet, God is the most certain reality in the universe and He tells us to have faith in Him. Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. (Heb. 11.1, NIV) Even with the uncertainty that comes with leadership, we can rely on God’s steadfastness certainty and His Spirit can override our human tendency to become fearful when things seem uncertain.

• Learn to listen more empathetically (i.e., when you present your idea to your board). Empathy, being able to step inside another’s shoes, is a key competency for successful pastors and leaders. One study even showed that empathetic doctors got sued less than non-empathetic ones (Ambady, 2002). It doesn’t mean that you don’t hold to your convictions. It does mean, however, that you try to listen with your heart. Empathy, kindness, and caring can actually help activate the trust hormone, oxytocin. When that happens, when others feel that you care and that you really listen, they will endear themselves more to you and to your leadership.

So, if you have to get hooked on something, don’t get hooked on being right about your ideas, but about being right with others and with the Lord.

What do you think? Am I on target with my thoughts?

Here's another great blog posting on the subject by Judith Glasser.

Related Posts:

• Motivate your Teams with These 4 Neuroscience Keys 
• 7 Rules of Conversations that Make for Great Meetings  

References:

Ambady, N. (2002) Surgeons’ tone of voice: A clue to malpractice history. Available from: [Accessed 27 March 2013].

I’m in a 5-part blog series that gives a brain-friendly tip that you can use to make your organizational changes brain-friendly so that they stick. Today’s is Sticky Tip 5: Seed your culture with a change mentality

Seed your culture with a change mentality

Change evokes fear in our emotional centers because it implies threat and the brain is wired to avoid threat and danger. However, the more familiar something becomes to us, the less threatened it will appear to us. So the more you familiarize you team with change, especially before you initiate a major one, the more likely they will receive it. How can you do that?

• First, begin with your leadership. Incorporate a change mentality into your leadership culture so that your core team or influencers don’t see it as a threat. Regularly include conversations about change into staff meetings, retreats, and leadership training. Encourage your leaders to think about it. Make change management a core competency you expect from your staff. Hire staff and recruit key volunteers who aren’t averse to change. Seek to make the concept less foreign.
• Second, include some aspect of change into your annual plans. Make it a core component in every planning cycle, not just when you face significant changes. Keep the conversation about change on the front burner. Help leaders think about ways to stay ahead of change rather than reacting to it when it becomes necessary.
• Finally, if you lead a church or ministry, regularly teach about the Biblical basis of change. Share stories of great heroes of the faith who embraced change and furthered the Kingdom as a result. Abraham obeyed God and moved to a foreign land. God blessed him with a new nation. Ruth left her home, family, and nation to follow Naomi into a strange land. As a result, she became part of the lineage of Jesus. And the disciples gave up their livelihoods to follow Jesus into uncharted waters as the Apostles. They were responsible for spreading the Gospel after Jesus ascended to heaven. Stories move and motivate others to embrace change.

To summarize my last 5 posts, I’ve included the 5 brain-friendly sticky change tips below.

1. Step into their shoes
2. Envision the benefits
3. Manage expectations
4. Invite input
5. Seed your culture with a change mentality

What would you add to this list?

What are you currently doing or what can you do to seed a change mentality into your organization’s culture?

Related Posts:

• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 1
• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 2
• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 3
• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 4

I’m in a 5-part blog series that gives a brain-friendly tip you can use to make your organizational changes brain-friendly so that they stick. Today’s is Sticky Tip 4: Invite input

Invite input

Creating a change buy-in plan infers that you want to help people own the change. Why should they own it? Because people don’t like being told what to do (i.e. “you need to change”). They would rather come up with their own ideas. 

Within reason, provide your team significant opportunities to give input into how the change will look. Give away small components of change to those lower on the leadership org chart. Although upper management and leadership must decide the what of change, providing options and opportunity for your team to fashion the how because the brain loves freedom and autonomy. Allowing others to create components of that change helps create a feeling of autonomy.

Also, give your team real, tangible, and easy channels through which they can give you feedback about the change. Simply knowing that you are serious about listening will decrease your team’s threat response and fear about the change.

What mechanism can you set up to solicit input from your team?

Related Posts:

• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 1
• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 2
• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 3

I’m in a 5-part blog series that gives a brain-friendly tip that you can use to make your organizational changes brain-friendly so that they stick. Today’s is Sticky Tip 3.

Manage expectations

As you create a change buy-in plan, consider the power of expectations. The brain likes to know what to expect so it can prepare for and anticipate what’s coming. If you team feels uncertain about the future, their anxiety will rise because they get into an away state (a feeling of fear). One way to help moderate this anxiety is to plan how you will set expectations.

It’s wise to set realistic ones and to avoid overselling the benefits. Yet, still build in hopeful expectations. When we expect something good, we get boost of dopamine, the neurotransmitter involved in reward and motivation. 

This process is much like the placebo effect when somebody thinks he’s taking a real drug for a health issue, even though it may be a sugar pill. The sugar pill actually helps some people feel better because their positive expectations activate a part of the brain that tempers pain (Fournier et al., 2010). And, positive expectations prime our brains to be even more receptive. 

David Rock, a noted writer on neuroscience insight wrote, “What you expect is what you experience (Rock, 2009, Kindle e-book loc. 140).” So when you implement the change, you want to have met the expectations you communicated. Better yet, exceed them. Our brains love it when we get something unexpected, like exceeded expectations.

When your team experiences the positive benefits of change, their dopamine levels increase which puts them in a better mood. And when our teams are in better moods, it can engender more confidence in your leadership. They then become even more open to new experiences and change. 

One way to engender this confidence is to recognize and celebrate small wins along the way. The Scriptures even tell us to Rejoice with those who rejoice…. (Rom. 12.15, NIV)

How can you manage expections for the change you hope to bring?

Related Posts:

• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 1
• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 2

References:

Fournier, J.C., DeRubeis, R.J., Hollon, S.D., Dimidjian, S., Amsterdam, J.D., Shelton, R.C. & Fawcett, J. (2010) Antidepressant drug effects and depression severity: a patient-level meta-analysis. JAMA: The Journal of the American Medical Association, 303 (1), pp.47–53.

Rock, D. (2009) Your Brain at Work: Strategies for Overcoming Distraction, Regaining Focus, and Working Smarter All Day Long. HarperCollins.

I’m in a 5-part blog series that gives brain-friendly tips you can use to make your organizational changes brain-friendly so that they stick. Today’s is Sticky Tip 2.

Envision the benefits

When we imagine accomplishing something it actually activates the same brain circuits as if we actually performed the task (Munzert et al., 2008). As you create your change plan, include ways to help your team envision the positive benefits the change can bring. 

Let’s say you’re moving your office to another location. Plan ways to help your team see how such a move will benefit them. Help them envision how a day in the new office would help them be more productive. Help them imagine what it would be like with new desks, comfortable chairs, a nice break room, and windows. 

Break into manageable bites their fears and concerns you’ve discerned by stepping into their shoes. Address each one. Fill in their knowledge gaps with information that creates a compelling image of the future.

Fill in the gaps with faith that with God’s help you can make the change. If you lead a faith-based ministry or a church, encourage your people with Hebrews 11.1. Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. (NLT)

And, the more you communicate that the change is less about you and your interests and more about their needs, the better your change will stick (Stiff & Mongeau, 2002, p. 111). For example, if you’re trying to create a change in a church, have someone beside the senior leaders share why they believe the change will help the cause of Christ.

Related Post:

• Brain Friendly Sticky Tip 1

In my last post, I suggested 6 brain barriers that limit successful change in churches, ministries, and organizations. Often when leaders plan change for their organization, they simply plan the change itself and neglect planning how to communicate the change. I believe, however, that if you want your change to stick and you want to minimize disruption, you must begin by creating a brain-friendly communication plan.

In my next five blogs, I suggest a brain-friendly tip each day that can help make your change sticky, all grounded in recent neuroscience findings. Here's tip 1.

Step into their shoes

Neuroscientists have learned that often what we say we will do we don’t, and what we say we won’t do, we often do. Of course it doesn't take a brain scientist to figure that out. 

But they’ve discovered that when the part of the brain just behind your eyes lights up, the orbitofrontal cortex (Falk et al., 2010), it can accurately predict future behavior. This part of the brain gives us the ability to see another’s perspective by stepping inside their shoes. It’s called mentalizing. As we think about ourselves or think about others, we engage this part of the brain. And what we do in the future is correlated with it lighting up. So when your team takes your perspective and when you take theirs, you can help move the change forward.

So as you begin to create a buy-in plan, think about how you can step into your team’s shoes. Try to discern their perspective of the pending change by asking yourself questions like these.

• What are their concerns?
• How do they feel about this change?
• What do they fear?
• What do they think is going on inside your head?
• What might be their biggest objections?

Better yet, ask a few key people for their perspective about the change. 

Also, ask yourself how can you create an environment so your team will feel safe to discuss the change. Feeling safe can create a toward response (versus an away or resistant response) which will make your team more open to the change (Whiting et al., 2012).

Related Post:

• 6 Brain Barriers to Healthy Church Change

References:

Falk, E.B., Berkman, E.T., Mann, T., Harrison, B. & Lieberman, M.D. (2010) Predicting Persuasion-Induced Behavior Change from the Brain. The Journal of neuroscience?: the official journal of the Society for Neuroscience, 30 (25), pp.8421–8424.

Whiting, J., Jones, E., Rock, D. & Bendit, X. (2012) Lead change with the brain in mind. Neuroleadership Journal, (4), pp.1–15.

Healthy change is necessary for any church, ministry, or business to thrive. However, leaders often run into these invisible brain barriers when they attempt change. Ignoring them can slow or stonewall a change. Since neuroscientists are now rapidly learning amazing new insights about the brain, it behooves us to learn about how our brains respond to change.

The next time you plan a change initiative for your church or organization, consider how you might lessen the effects of these brain barriers that can stifle it.

1. Brain Barrier 1: Undoing a bad impression is harder than creating a good one. It’s the “you don’t have a second chance to make a good first impression” adage. Neuroscientists have found that to be true. It’s not just an old wives’ tale (Lount et al., 2008). Poorly introduced change will start your change on the wrong footing.
2. Brain Barrier 2: People initially assume the worst. Your brain is wired to pick up the negative more than the positive. In fact, 2/3 of the brain cells in the flight-fight part of your brain, the amygdala, are wired to pick up on what’s wrong rather than on what’s right (Hanson, 2010). Our brains have a built-in negativity bias. People will initially latch onto potential negatives of your change rather than onto the positives.
3. Brain Barrier 3: The brain can only handle so much change at once. Trying to create too much change too quickly increases the brain’s fear response and will hinder that change (Hemp, 2009).
4. Brain Barrier 4: People will fill in knowledge gaps about your change with fear. Change causes uncertainty about the future which in turn breeds fear. And when the brain senses fear, it doesn’t like it. It will act out of that fear which dampens the brain’s ability to think clearly. The less information you provide about your change initiative, the more others will fill in the knowledge gaps with their negative assumptions. As a result, they’ll be more fearful and more resistant to change.
5. Brain Barrier 5: People underestimate their ability to weather difficult future events (Wilson & Gilbert, 2005). Uncertainty causes us to poorly forecast how well we can face the difficulties that changes might bring. The term is called “affective forecasting.” When you present change, others will often initially assume that life will be worse for them because of your change.
6. Brain Barrier 6: Emotions play a significant role in decision-making and influence how well others will embrace change. Just presenting facts about your change without engaging positive and hopeful emotions about the future will seldom move it forward.

In my next post I give some brain-friendly keys to change.

What barriers have you seen from others when you’ve introduced change?

Related posts:

• 6 Keys to Mastering Church Change 
• How to Respond When Someone Leaves Your Church 

References:

Hanson, R. (2010) Confronting the Negativity Bias [Internet]. Available from: <http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-wise-brain/201010/confronting-the-negativity-bias> [Accessed 31 January 2013].

Hemp, P. (2009) Death by Information Overload - Harvard Business Review [Internet]. Available from: <http://hbr.org/2009/09/death-by-information-overload/ar/1> [Accessed 20 March 2013].

Lount, R.B., Zhong, C.-B., Sivanathan, N. & Murnighan, J.K. (2008) Getting Off on the Wrong Foot: The Timing of a Breach and the Restoration of Trust. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 34 (12), pp.1601–1612.

Wilson, T.D. & Gilbert, D.T. (2005) Affective Forecasting. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 14 (3), pp.131–134.

My friend Dr. Aubrey Malphurs is one of the top church leadership experts in the country today. He's written over 20 books and knows his stuff. This week his newest book, Look before you Lead, hits the bookstores and online retailers. I asked him to write this guest post today. Read it with interest and consider adding his new book to your library.

Why don't churches grow? Consider these 6 reasons Dr. Malphurs has discovered that causes many churches to stagnate.

1) You don’t know yourself

Many pastors assume they are gifted for what they are doing. Do you know what you are best at? Pastors should take the time to listen to those who know them and assess how God has designed them.

2) You don’t know your church

Let’s be honest. Many pastors take positions for less than holy reasons (needed a job, hated previous job, wanted to lead, etc). When this happens what gets overlooked is proper analysis of the church they are moving into. If the pastor doesn’t understand the values, belief, and assumptions of the church he is in, it is likely they will never change and the church will never grow.

My recently released book, “Look Before You Lead: How to Discern and Shape Your Church Culture” addresses the importance of pastors assessing the culture of a potential church (and vice-versa) prior to taking the position. This is an alignment issue that affects churches on many levels (see #4 below) and in many situations not only before a new pastor comes but once a new pastor arrives with hopes of making changes.

3) You church doesn’t know its context

Churches are very skilled at providing events, resources, and ministry opportunities for those ALREADY in the church. But what about the surrounding community? When is the last time you did a demographic study? Exegete your culture if you want your biblical exegesis to have any impact.

4) The pastor’s values don’t align with the church

Many pastors wonder why the church doesn’t respond to their leadership. They aren’t perfect, but it isn’t all their fault either. Write down the church’s top five values (actual, not aspirational) and your values as a pastor. Are the lists the same? What does this information tell you?

5) The church assumes the community likes what they like

Inside of church walls, we do an excellent job convincing ourselves that everyone should want the same things we want--this will never happen. Consider the likes, wants, needs, and values of the community and leverage this without violating biblical norms.

6) Your church isn’t honest about its aspirational values

If a church can’t clearly articulate its aspirational values, its head is likely in the sand, avoiding reality. If you don’t identify an issue, you’ll likely never improve it.

What barriers to growth have you seen in your church?

If you'd like to learn more about Aubrey's ministry, check out his web site and be sure to see the book trailer here.

Every week in the U.S., pastors preach upwards of 400,000 sermons. That excludes Bible studies taught by hundreds of thousands of Sunday school teachers and small group leaders.

I’ve delivered in excess of 1,500 sermons and bible studies myself. But what difference have they made in people’s lives? I suppose I won’t really know until I get to heaven.

In the meantime, however, I believe I should learn everything I can to make my teaching and preaching stickier.

And nothing sticks unless those who listen to us engage their brains.

Unfortunately, though, most pastors seldom consider how brain processes influence learning. It’s a missing link in today’s preaching and teaching. I believe it would behoove every pastor to learn how God made our brain and how it affects learning.

In the last 20 years we’ve learned amazing new insights about how God created our brain and how it’s involved in learning. With the advent of the functional MRI (fMRI), scientists can see what brain neighborhoods activate when we think certain things, pay attention, learn, and feel emotion. These new insights can pay great dividends to pastors who learn about the brain.

I recently participated in a webinar sponsored by the Neuroleadership Institute and ASTD on the brain (click the link to download some cool papers). In one word, fascinating.

Dr. Grace Chang, a neuroscientist at U.C.L.A., presented the first session on making learning sticky. She began by defining one of the two types of memory, declarative memory. Non-declarative memory is the other kind (think riding a bike, you can’t describe how you do it, you just do it). Declarative memory, in our context, would be the kind we would want to foster when we teach. We want our listeners to be able to consciously recall the Biblical content of our sermons so that the Holy Spirit can take that truth and transform their beliefs and behavior.

Dr. Chang said that three main brain processes compose declarative memory.

1. Acquire the information (getting it in called encoding). An example would be what you do to get your sermon into the minds of your listeners (i.e., the spoken sermon itself, visuals you use, dramas to reinforce the point).
2. Retain the information (keeping it in called storing). This happens when your listeners actually remember what you said instead of forgetting it when they walk out of the church.
3. Retrieve the information (using it called accessing). This is simply application. You want your listeners not only to remember what you said, but to apply the truth in their daily lives as well.

So, is brain-based preaching new age voodoo?

Not at all.

Brain-based preaching is an intentional process by which you consider how people’s brains process information and learn. When we keep the brain in mind and in particular these three memory processes, I believe our sermons will become sticker and result in greater life transformation.

If you want to read a great article on brain-based learning, I recommend this one.

Next week when you finalize your sermon, take five minutes and ask yourself what you could do to incorporate each of these three brain processes in your sermon to make it sticker.

In fact, don’t wait until next week. What is one small brain-based change that immediately comes to your mind right now that could make this week’s sermon stickier?

Related posts:

• Sticky Sermons: How Brain Insights can Improve Them
• Are your Sermons Hard or Easy to Listen to?

Recently I was privileged to hear Dr. James Galvin speak on leadership.  He’s authored many books on the subject and has consulted with such organizations as the Willow Creek Assocation, Zondervan, and Wycliffe. He explained a concept called “The Full Range Leadership Model” which contrasts transactional leadership from transformational leadership. You can find a really cool visual that describes the two here.  

Essentially transactional leadership is “you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours.” At times we must lead as transactional leaders. For example, we set a ministry or organizational goal and when a staffer helps that goal get met, a reward comes. In contrast, however, we should seek to grow our leadership so that we lead more often as transformational leaders.

Based on the descriptions below, how would others describe your default leadership patterns? The first four represent transactional leaders. The last five characterize transformational leaders.

• I often avoid getting involved. I tend to be passive.
• I loosely monitor what’s happening in the ministry and step in only if things go really bad.
• I set clear goals and standards and closely monitor the staff and step in when things begin to get off track.
• I set clear goals, provide needed support, and praise good performance.

• I listen to others and coach them to bring out their best.
• I ask others for their thoughts and perspectives.
• I’m genuinely positive, enthusiastic, and cast a compelling vision.
• I often talk about shared mission, vision, and values with the team.
• My simple presence can inspire others’ confidence.

Find a few trusted friends and ask them to share with you where they’d place you on this scale.

Related posts:

• 24 Words that Describe a Leader’s Job.
• Unmet Expectations: How to Pull of out of a Leadership Lull

In 1990 the U.S. government declared the next decade as the “Decade of the Brain” to foster more research about the brain. Since that time we’ve learned incredible new insight about how the brain and our minds affect life and leadership.

Pastors and other ministry leader would do their ministries well to incorporate learning about the brain into their leadership development and growth. Research has discovered that subtle processes in our brains impact teamwork, emotional regulation, motivation, and communication.  The new term “neuroleadership” describes this emerging field.

I’m fully convinced that the more we learn about this incredible God created gift called the brain and about how our minds work, the better leaders we’ll become.

I’ve listed eight biblical foundations that support learning about our brain and its function. I’ve also written several blogs on this subject. You can click here to read them.

1. References to the mind/thinking fill the Scriptures (over 120 times).

• Is. 26.3 You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.
• Proverbs 23:7  As a man thinks so he is . . .
• Rom. 8:6… the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace;
• Col. 3:2   Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

2. Since the brain is part of the body, we must honor God with our brains.

• 1Cor. 6.19 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

3. The bible links the working of the mind with the working of the Holy Spirit and our spirits (I Cor. 2).

4. God commands us to remember (over 175 time). Remembering is an important function of our minds.

5. We are to strive for an undivided heart and mind.

• Psa. 86.11…give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.
• James 1.8 …he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.

6. The bible commands us to renew our minds so that we can live transformed lives.

• Rom. 12:2   Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

7. The bible instructs us to think a certain way because what we think about profoundly impacts behavior. 

• Phil. 4.8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things. 

8. Jesus wants us to love him with our entire being, including our minds.

• Matt. 22.37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’

If you’d like to read a great primer on the brain with many applications to leadership, I recommend a secular one called, Your Brain At Work, by Dr. David Rock. I'm currently writing a book for IVP that will release late 2013 or early 2014 that will incorporate some of these new insights.

What insights about the brain have helped you lead better? 

Wise leaders carefully manage church change. Healthy church management includes not just the bird’s eye view (big picture implications) but also considers the individual view, what’s going on inside the individual church member or leader when you, as the leader, present change. Neuroscience offers helpful insight about unconscious processes that go on inside our brains when people face change. Consider these insights and suggestions the next time you plan change for your church.

People appreciate certainty and autonomy because the brain craves both. David Rock, one of the leader proponents of applying neuroscience to leadership (neuroleadership) suggests an acrostic called SCARF that represents five essential brain processes that influence motivation and change management. See my blog here that explains SCARF. The ‘c’ and the ‘a’ stand for certainty and autonomy. I’ve listed 5 insights below that relate these two components to change management.

1. People naturally assume the worst. Our brain is actually wired to pick up threats and negative possibilities around us more than the positive. 2/3 of our brain cells in the flight-fight part of our brain, the amygdala, are wired to pick up on the negative.
2. People naturally fill in knowledge gaps with fear. Uncertainty about the future (and change) breeds this fear.
3. Ambiguity creates more fear than measured risk. That is, the more people have to fill in the knowledge gaps, the greater the fear about and resistance to change. Measured risk, however, fills in some of those gaps and lessens anxiety.
4. Undoing a wrong impression is harder than creating a good impression. It’s the old adage “you don’t have a second chance to make a good first impression.” That’s not just a quaint saying. Neuroscientists have shown it to be true.
5. People understate their ability to ride out difficult future events. Uncertainty causes us to poorly forecast how well we can face difficulty. The term is “affective forecasting.” When you present change, people will initially assume that the church will come out worse than expected, although the opposite is often true.
6. Emotions play a very important part in decision making. Just presenting the facts is seldom enough to move people forward.

So, in light of these insights, what are some positive steps you can take to most effectively manage church change?

1. Build in small, short-term wins along the way. These wins will give a greater sense of certainty. Remember, people (and their brains) love certainty.
2. Fill in the knowledge gaps with truth. In other words, communicate, communicate, communicate. Keep people in the loop about your progress with the change initiative.
3. Provide a feedback loop. Give people in your church a real, tangible way they can give feedback to you about the process. Simply knowing they have that ability to communicate to you and that you are really listening will decrease their anxiety about the future.
4. Within reason, provide people small ways they can choose about how the change will look. Although the leadership will have decided the big picture change, providing options and opportunity for people to hone what those changes within the big change will look like increases autonomy. Remember, people love autonomy.
5. Fill in knowledge gaps with Faith. Preach and teach on faith. Keep verses like Hebrews 11.1 often before the people.

Heb. 11.1 Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. (NLT)

What have you done that has helped smooth church change?

Related Posts: 

• 6 Keys to Mastering Church Change  
• Etch-a-Sketch Church Planning  

Vision casting

  Problem solving

    Giving feedback

      Rewarding staff

        Influencing others

          Recruiting leaders

            Developing people

              Developing systems

                Communicating well

                  Delegating workload

                    Relationship building

                      Establishing priorities

Related post:

• 3 Probing Question Every Pastor Should Ask Himself

Brian Dodd is one of my favorite bloggers. He has a real knack to pick up on what's currently happening in the world and extract really cool leadership  insights. He's one of those guys I believe church leader should follow and read regularly. He is a Generosity Architect and leadership consultant for INJOY Stewardship Solutions and he's invested in many of the country's top church leaders.

It's an honor to have him as a guest blogger today. I picked one of my favorite posts he's written. Not only is this a great post, but all the other blogs listed are gems as well. So, enjoy.

Sustaining and growing a healthy church requires systematic leadership training. To lead most effectively, staff, boards, and volunteers need to constantly improve their knowledgebase and skills. I’m enrolled in a two-year program to get a masters degree in neuroleadership (check out the cool animation about neuroleadership here: www.charlesstone.com). In a recent webinar lecture, my teacher used a technique that pastors can use to increase attention and retention in their leadership training meetings. Here’s what she did.

Drowsy from a poor night’s sleep and in a brain fog because of too many carbs for lunch, I forced myself to log in for my class. Had I been given a choice, I would have taken a nap instead. My attention level was low. However, the professor used several simple techniques to rouse my attention. As a result, I learned a lot from the lecture.

On one power point slide she printed a single URL. She cued up the slide in this way. She said we were about to do an exercise that required us to focus for 30 seconds on people in the video who wore white shirts and were throwing a ball to each other. We were to count the number of times they passed the ball. She also commented that most people’s attention span lasts only 12 seconds.

Immediately part of my brain alerted other parts to pay attention because something was about to happen. These internal dynamics helped elevate my attention with a shot of norepinephrine, which is related to adrenalin. And we all know what adrenalin does to us. In this 30 second exercise she used 6 techniques that literally woke me and helped me learn better.

1. Curiosity: the exercise woke up the part of my brain that is drawn to novelty. Novel things get our attention more easily than common things.
2. Challenge: I was drawn into the lecture by the prospect of competition with others and with myself. I now wanted to learn.
3. Motivation: the 12-second rule motivated me. I thought to myself, I know I can pay attention longer than that.
4. Relevance: related to the challenge, not only was I good with numbers but the exercise was relevant to the current topic about attention.
5. Anticipation: in anticipation I sat up in my chair, opened my eyes wider, and felt my heart rate elevate.
6. Satisfaction: After the exercise, I felt good because I had beaten the odds and gotten the right answer. This good feeling was due to the increase of another neurotransmitter, dopamine, which makes us feel good when it enters our brain’s pleasure center (the nucleus accumbens).

The next time you schedule a leadership meeting, try to use several of these simple techniques to increase attention and thus improve learning.

What techniques have you tried that have helped enhance your leadership meetings?

Related posts:

• Discover Your Leadership Vibe in Five Minutes
• Are your Shadow Beliefs Stifling Your Leadership?

One of the greatest strengths a leader can posses is his (or her) ability keep his emotions in check. However, when we feel rejected, hurt, or fearful, we often react, get visibly angry, or becoming defensive. Those responses can hinder God’s work in our lives and hurt our leadership. So what can we do?

Scripture consistently speaks against allowing anger (or any other negative emotion) to control us.

• “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,… (Eph. 4.26)
• Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. (Eph. 4.31)
• But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. (Col. 3.8)
• My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. (James 1.19-20)

But, how do we control these feelings that sometimes spring upon us without our even thinking about them? Often when we feel angry or fearful, we believe that suppressing those feelings will reduce their power. On the contrary, it does the opposite. Neuroscientists have discovered that when we try to suppress an emotion it negatively affects us in two ways.

1. It diminishes our memory and the ability to see and remember details of an event.
2. Most importantly, suppressing the emotion actually does the opposite. Rather than helping us control it, it actually diminishes the internal resources available for us to respond to the situation in a biblical way. Scientists are now discovering what the Bible said long ago: So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. (Gal. 5.16)

The next time one of these emotions begins to control your thinking and behavior, consider apply the steps behind the acronym CART, a simple way to control an unhealthy expression of an emotion.

• “C” stands for change the situation. If you can appropriately change or avoid your situation so that you can avoid what could cause the emotion, do so. This is the easiest way to ‘nip it in the bud’ before it becomes full blown. Recently I became very angry about what someone did. I was not able to remove myself from the situation because the act was done at a distance. So, the issue was in my head rather than in physical close proximity. I had to move to the next step.
• “A” stands for attend to a distraction. If some event prompts one of these emotions, distract yourself. Look for something else to think about or focus on. In the above situation my anger was rising to a boiling point. I then tried to distract myself by listening to an mp3 talk on neuroleadership which somewhat moderated the emotion. However, I kept tuning out the talk and tuning into my internal self-talk that kept the emotion active. I then applied the next step.
• “R” stands for reappraise the situation. After I realized that my mp3 distraction could not consistently lessen my emotion, I sat back in my chair, closed my eyes, and for a few moments thought about what I was thinking about. This is called mindfulness. I then intentionally began to look at the situation differently. I reminded myself that my love for this person should trump my anger toward her. I told myself that my anger would not change her, much less facilitate a reasonable conversation with her about her actions. As I began to mentally prioritize my relationship with her over her action, the emotion’s intensity began to complete this process of regulating this emotion.
• “T” stands for temper my visible response. At first I tried to suppress my emotion, which only increased it (as I mentioned above). However, after I admitted my anger and reappraised the situation (R), the Lord helped me avoid a potentially unhealthy and damaging reaction toward this person.

So, the next time an emotion begins to get the best of you, toss it into a CART.

What has worked for you to control your emotions in a healthy way?

Related posts:

• 5 Animals Pastors Sometimes Act Like
• 9 Signs your Hormones May be Hijacking Your Leadership

I recently read a great article by Brad Powell on the 7-C’s of great ministry leaders. I’ve heard of the three C’s, but his 7 captured the essence of great leaders.

Here are his 7-C’s.

1. Calling: we must have a sense of God’s all where we currently serve
2. Character: perhaps the most important, there is no substitute for integrity and a pure heart
3. Competence: we need the right gifts and abilities to match the  needs in our ministry
4. Confidence: our confidence in the Lord gives us what we need to lead without hesitation
5. Courage: we must be willing to take unpopular stands sometimes and remind ourselves that we play to an audience of One
6. Commitment: if we are going to last for the long haul we must be ‘all in’
7. Continuous growth: a good leader must constantly be learning and growing.

What C’s for great leaders would you add (or any other qualities that don't begin with C)?

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• An Attitude of Gratitude
• What if all our Web Searches were Made Public

Whether we lead a church ministry, a para-church organization, or run a business, we Christian leaders want to lead at our best. Books, leadership seminars, coaching, and mentoring can all help us grow our skills. I’ve used all three to develop mine. Recently, though, I’ve realized an emerging and rapidly growing field is filling a gap in spiritual leadership. 

It’s called neuroleadership. Essentially, neuroleadership takes what neuroscience is discovering about the brain and applies it to the art of spiritually leading. You can see a cool animation here by clicking on “What is neuroleadership?” David Rock, author of  a great book, Your Brain at Work, coined the term.

Interestingly, the bible affirms neuroleadership principles. The word 'mind' appears over 120 times in scripture. Solomon writes in Proverbs that as we think so we are. The Gospel writers tell us to love God with all of our hearts and souls and minds and strength. And the Apostle Paul reminds us that we experience true transformation when we renew our minds. Curt Thompson who wrote Anatomy of the Soul writes that neuroscience is much like a magnifying glass to help us see things we may not otherwise have seen. But a magnifying glass is only as good as the light that illuminates the object we are looking at. That light, for a Christian, is God’s Word.

When pastors and Christian leaders learn and apply neuroleadership principles, they will develop into competent leaders who . . .

• stay cool under pressure.
• improve relationships with others.
• consistently make wise ministry decisions.
• strategize and navigate change well.
• learn to inspire others through their teaching.

Over the next several months I plan several blogs on how we can leverage this incredible God-created gift, the brain, for greatest Kingdom impact. To maximize our minds and brains, consider these three essentials.

1. Learn how the brain works. Without trying to become an anatomy expert, take a few minutes to Google “brain” and read a few articles about how the brain works and its anatomy. You’ll also find several good YouTube videos as well. This four-minute video summarizes the techniques scientists are now using to learn more about the brain. This 55-minutes video by David Rock explains how understanding the brain can make a big difference in your leadership.
2. Practice good brain care habits. Adequate sleep, healthy food, and regular exercise all help keep your brain sharp and functioning well. Scientists have also discovered that managing stress also protects the brain.
3. Learn the art of self-awareness. Often our brain focuses on negative thoughts that take up precious brain space we need to think and lead well. When we “think about what we are thinking about” we have begun to win the battle against negative thinking. The Apostle Paul speaks to this issue in Phil. 4.8 when he writes, Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things.

So, as you grow in your leadership, consider how to use your brain to maximize your life and leadership.

In your education and experience, how have your insights into how the brain works helped your leadership?

Related posts:

1. When Pastors Lead from their Lizard Brains
2. 9 Signs Your Hormones May be Hijacking Your Leadership

Recently my son and I and another pastor enjoyed the privilege of training over 100 Haitian pastors in Port au Prince. We held the training at our host pastor’s church, a tin-roofed block building that could seat about 125. It had no air conditioning so the temperature inside rose to over 100 degrees. Five roof-mounted fans blew, but only moved the hottest air from the ceiling down to the pastors.

I learned four leadership lessons from these pastors.

1. When you have little, you appreciate things more. Haiti, the poorest country in the western hemisphere, faced a magnitude 7.0 earthquake on Tuesday, January 12, 2010 which left over 300,000 dead, 300,000 injured, and 1,000,000 homeless. Not one of these pastors were untouched by the tragedy in some way. Our host pastor’s daughter was cocooned for three days in the rubble. His church dug her out, with picks and machetes. Added to their misery is a severe lack of training for pastors. Yet, these men and women deeply appreciated the few hours we poured into them. Their appreciation reminded to be more grateful for the abundance I experience in our country.
2. Small things really do matter. At the conclusion of the two-day training, each pastor received a personalized certificate of completion. As we handed their certificates to them, shook their hands, and congratulated them they beamed with joy. Their joy reminded me that as a pastor I must constantly think of small ways that I can encourage others, whether with a gift, a kind word, or a thoughtful email.
3. Patience does not depend upon circumstances. Not only did the temperature in that small church soar above 100 degrees but most of the pastors wore long sleeve shirts and ties. Some even wore a suit. [Their culture expects pastors to dress up.] Yet even as they sat in the sweltering heat, they conveyed utmost respect to each of us, although I did notice a nod or two. Their patience in these unfavorable circumstances convicted me that sometimes I get impatient waiting in life for more than a minute at the grocery store’s “ten items or less” line.
4. We must invest in emerging leaders. I felt privileged that my 28-year-old son, Josh, joined me last year in Mexico when I trained pastors as well as this year in Haiti. He serves as an intern in New Hampshire and is completing his ThM degree at Gordon Conwell Seminary. The pastors loved him. At the end of the training they asked me to come back and stay for 15 days. They asked Josh to come back and stay for a year. Josh’s presence offered them hope that young, godly leaders do exist.

We planned for and delivered quality teaching on leadership to those 100 pastors. I pray that what we shared will help them further the Kingdom in Haiti. 

However, I may have received the greatest blessing through what I learned from 100 pastors in 100 degrees.

If you’ve traveled internationally for ministry, what insights have you learned from your experience?

Related Post: What I learned from Latino Pastors

I'm currently in a master's program in neuroleadership through Middlesex University in the UK and I'm having a blast.  Christian leaders and pastors can learn much from the latest neuroscience discoveries about the brain. Neuroscientists have discovered that the brain profoundly  impacts leadership, emotional regulation, motivating others, navigating change, team building, and effective communication.

If you spend much time preaching or teaching, you'll find this blog helpful.

Every ministry leader wants others to become more like Jesus. For that to happen, their thinking, behavior, and habits must change. Those changes don't occur in a void. Rather, God takes what we learn about the bible, character, and God honoring behavior to transform us. A major input to this new way of living comes through our preaching and teaching.

But for lasting change to occur, our brains must imbed new information into our long-term memory instead of our short-term memory. Think of the difference between cramming for a test in geography the night before the test (we soon forget the facts) and learning a new language (if we continue to use it, the language gets imbedded deep within our memories). Neuroscientists call this embedding process consolidation. The name itself pictures the process. Although initial information comes into our minds through our five senses, it passes through a part of the brain called the hippocampus. However, if we want the new information (i.e. our sermons) to stick, the memories must be spread to other parts of the brain to consolidate them into long term memory.

So if you want to increase the chance that life transformation happens through your preaching and teaching, consider these practical steps to help imbed your teaching into long term memory thus making your sermons more "sticky."

1. Increase focused attention by engaging more senses than just sight and sound. Creatively use taste, smell and touch. When people pay more attention to your sermons, they engage the hippocampus more. And unless it is engaged, people won't remember what you say.
2. Deliver your sermon in an organized way. Use a visual metaphor or picture at the beginning to tie the talk together. If you deliver your sermon in a random way, memory decreases.  This is called pre-encoding which organizes the brain to remember better.
3. Break up the message into two parts and place a different element between each (ie. video or music). In the second part creatively review the content you presented in the first part. The following week again review the previous week's main points. Neuroscientists have discovered that spacing between learning something and practicing it increases memory retention.
4. Use a power point flashcard at the end of the talk by asking the people to fill in the blanks of your sermon’s key points. When someone self-generates information it sticks much better than when they are simply told information.
5. Ask the people to personally apply one aspect of the message to their own lives. This concept called self-relevant processing deepens memory more than almost anything else. It relates to helping them emotionally connect to what you want them to learn. Emotional stamping is a powerful memory enhancer.
6. Ask the people to imagine themselves not only doing the application but also to imagine the context (where) in which they will do it. Again, neuroscience has discovered that people recall memories better when they imagine the context in which they learned or practiced something new.

Run last week's bible study or sermon through this grid and see what improvements you can make for next week.

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X-Factor: A variable in a situation that could have the most significant impact on the outcome.

X-Factor: a tv show by Simon Cowell that didn't do so well.

The term X-factor usually carries a positive mystique, a quality not readily identified except by its impact. We'll say...

• The singer has the X-factor that makes her great.
• The business leader has the X-factor that makes her successful.
• The pastor has the X-factor that makes him engaging.

But what about the brain's X-factor? Is it a good quality?

Neuroscience has recently discovered important concepts that can enhance a leader's leadership impact. Essentially our brain uses two processing systems through which we lead, interact with people, and control our emotional and behavioral responses.

Daniel Kahneman, a Noble prize winner, explains these systems in his book Thinking, Fast and Slow  as system 1 and system 2. Matthew Lieberman, a professor at UCLA describes the systems as reflexive and reflective. These two words capture the essence of each process.

• reflexive, the X-system (the X-factor): that part of our brain that if overstimulated reacts and acts impulsively. It's spontaneous and acts automatically.
• reflective, the C-system: that part of our brain that acts with intention and thinks before acting. It regulates emotionally reactivity.

In my 30 years in ministry I've been taught and have taught that practicing various spiritual disciplines will yield a controlled, Spirit-filled life. But how many of us leaders, although we practice those disciplines, can react with anger to a staff person, become defensive at a lay leader's comment, or simply act like a jerk in the heat of the moment?

We're all guilty. I know I am. So what's missing?

I believe that Christian leadership teaching has failed to incorporate what neuroscience has discovered about how our brain functions. I'm now on a quest to evangelize Christian leaders to learn how our God-given brain can serve us well.

The two systems I mentioned above, when in balance, work in tandem to help us lead well. However, when the X-system gets overloaded, the X-factor hinders effective leadership.

When we experience stress, the X-factor strengthens as hormones (primarily epinephrine and dopamine) surge into our brains and create these problems.

• The  brain's executive center we need for creativity and planning gets tired and becomes ineffective. It's like a girl drawing a picture with an etch-a-sketch and her brother repeatedly grabbing it and shaking it, thus erasing her uncompleted picture. Similarly, when the X-factor kicks in, we can't keep those critical creative thoughts in our minds long enough to make them stick.
• Emotional accelerators diminish the impulse braking centers in our brain.
• The reactive parts of our brain take over and we can become defensive.
• Objectivity diminishes.
• We don't listen well to others because our brains can't concentrate on other's viewpoints without prematurely framing our own responses.
•  We default to easy, mindless activities such as excessively checking emails rather than focusing on important tasks.

Stay tuned for more blogs on this subject.

--

Related post: When Pastors Lead from their Lizard Brains.

Last week Augusta, Georgia hosted one of the world’s most prestigious golf tournaments, The Masters. Tiger Woods, a four-time winner and arguable today’s most talented golfer made the cut. He entered the tournament hoping for a strong showing. Unfortunately he finished tied for 40^th.

What happened?

Neuroscience gives us clues not only to Tiger’s downward spiral that began when his personal foibles became public in 2009, but to how leaders lose their effectiveness when they don’t lead themselves well.

Leaders need at least three components to self-lead: competency, composure, and concentration. These three brain structures influence these qualities.

• Competency: the basil ganglia, through a reward system, help fashion skill and form habits that develop competency.
• Composure: the limbic system must stay balanced to ensure emotional control and to aid composure.
• Concentration: the pre-frontal cortex (PFC), the brain’s executive center, facilitates good decision-making and promotes concentration.

In Tiger’s case, for years his basil ganglia have helped him hone his superb golfing skills. And as every golfer knows, golf is a mind game and requires intense concentration. His pre-frontal cortex has served him well as his past performance has shown his ability to concentrate during tournaments. Unfortunately this time his limbic system had a meltdown on the 16^th hole when he kicked his clubs and cursed, a golfer’s faux pas. His game went downhill from then.

Without disparaging Tiger, his story provides a living metaphor for leaders who recognize self-leadership is a pre-requisite to leading others. The basal ganglia, the limbic system, and the pre-frontal cortex must all ‘dance’ together for us to self-lead well. When they don’t, basal ganglia developed skills fall short, PFC aided concentration evaporates, and limbic system meltdowns replace composure.

And when that happens, the result is costly. In Tiger’s case, he earned only $32,000. The winner earned $1,441,000.

What has you experience been when a leader around you lost his or her self-leadership composure through a meltdown?

_____

Related posts:

• 9 Signs Hormones may be Hijacking your Leadership
• When Pastors Lead from their Lizard Brains

If you follow my blog, you know I love to read. As a life-long learner I learn from others' writings and  I believe integrous writers should always give generous attribution to authors whose ideas they embrace or write about. That's why I often reference my ideas. Recently I read Do More Great Work by Michael Stanier. It's a short but good read.

Stanier takes the reader through simple exercises that helps him clarify when he is at his best. In my case, I read the book with an eye to discover when I lead at my best. This is especially important in my life now as I transition from a senior pastor role into a coach/consultant role for pastors and churches.

In one exercise I spent a few minutes choosing words that best describe me when I am at my best. For example, some of those words included poised, reflective, and focused. The next step, however, make this exercise stick. After I picked about 20 words and narrowed them to a dozen or so I then wrote opposite each word another contrasting word that would describe me when I'm not quite myself. I didn't necessarily choose words opposite in meaning but ones more anemic in contrast to the others. Oppose to the three words above I chose diplomatic, distant, and intense.

When I chose the contrasting words it helped clarify my leadership vibe, that state of leadership toward which I should aim.

Here's the list that contrasts when I'm at my best (on the left) and when I'm just ok (to the right).

• Poised---diplomatic
• Non-anxious---self controlled
• Reflective---distant
• Focused---intense
• Clear minded---distracted
• Relaxed---quiet
• Undeterred---pushy
• Unhurried---tolerant
• Animated---talkative
• Present---just there
• Commanding---forceful
• Self-aware—self focused
• Strategic---tactical

I put this list in my iPhone prayer app (My Prayer Lists) and review it almost daily. Those words remind me to seek to live them out as I lead and relate to others.

Take 10 minutes and see if this exercise does for you what it did for me.

___

Related posts:

• Why Pastors are Sometimes Like Turtles
• Shadow Beliefs that may be StiflingYour Leadership

I think extroverts think introverts should be like them.

Introverts wish they were more like extroverts.

Einstein was right.

If we want our churches to make the greatest kingdom impact, we must help facilitate change or else we become "insane" leaders. However, we often don't manage change wisely.

I've listed 10 change blunders leaders make.

1. Force the change no matter who resists.
2. Marginalize those who resist change.
3. Don't tolerate anything less than 100% success.
4. Blame others when the change doesn't go well.
5. Bring about change as fast as you can before the people realize what just happened.
6. Don't listen to others who disagree.
7. Assume that silence in others means they are on board with you.
8. Don't listen to your spouse.
9. Don't admit ANY fear.
10. What would you add as a tenth?

_____

Related posts:

• 3 Keys to Making Change Stick in your Church
• How to Master Change in Your Church

This is an excerpt from my book 5 Ministry Killers that appeared in the spring, 2010, edition of Leadership Journal.

___

Pastor John was just finishing a long Sunday morning. With a weary "pastor's grin" on his face, he chatted with those who lingered. He was tired, hungry, and ready to go home, when two women approached—one he knew was never happy. Her friend said, "Pastor, Ann here wants to tell you something that happened this past week."

He thought, Wonderful, just what I need, another disgruntled member. But with a practiced caring tone he asked, "What happened?"

The veins in Ann's neck swelled as she blurted, "I want you to know that I left three voice mails with the youth minister to talk to him about a problem I'm having with my son. And he never called me back. That so-called youth minister of yours is not doing his job. My son needed help, and he didn't even care enough to call me back."

John's face flushed, and he slowly responded: "Ann, I'm sure Pastor Jimmy tried to call you back and wasn't able to reach you. I will check with him and have him call you again tomorrow. I'm very sorry the two of you didn't connect."

She retorted, "Well, I've decided I'm going to another church where the pastors care about people." She crossed her arms and stood with a what-do-you-think-about-that stare.

Stifling the urge to give her a karate chop, he cleared his throat and answered, "Okay, Ann, I understand your concern, and you must do what you feel is best for your family. But I will get to the bottom of this."

She spun around and stormed off. Her friend grimaced and followed sheepishly.

For several days John mulled over this encounter and kept his pain to himself, even after discovering that the youth pastor had indeed attempted to contact Ann.

The worst was yet to come. Later that week he received a call from a woman with whom he'd often faced conflict. She was a bit of a drama queen, and her family was the church's biggest giver. She requested a meeting to "discuss an issue."

She and her husband arrived at John's office, and after a few pleasantries she explained that Ann had called her about the recent conversation. Ann was "very upset" because John "hadn't been responsive to her need." John tried to explain what happened from his perspective, but her mind was made up. With dramatic flair, she swept her arms outward, and her voice quivered as she said, "Why didn't you just reach out your arms and give her a big hug?"

John's puke level rose to Orange. He didn't know what to say except "I'm sorry she felt the way she did." This ended the conversation.

As John sat in his office chair that night, his emotions roiled. After he breathed a short prayer he went home. His wife asked how his day went, and he replied with a less-than-forthright "Okay. Nothing much out of the ordinary." He didn't want to burden her—she too had often endured the ire of the drama queen. He wished he knew someone with whom he could process his pain.

For the next two weeks, he spent the bulk of his quiet time praying about this disappointment.

John's story illustrates what recent research has discovered to be one of the two most common ways pastors handle these issues—by ourselves and in prayer.

We all unconsciously turn to our default responses when we face ministry tensions. Often those instincts are one-sided. Harboring pain privately can be a ministry killer.

Common responses of pastors

The Barna Group research probed what we pastors do in response to our frustrations and disappointments. They asked: "Think back to the last time you felt disappointed or frustrated with people in your congregation. What did you do—if anything—to address the challenges you faced?" The pastors could mention anything that came to mind.Here are the top ten responses:

• Prayed about the issue (37%)

• Confronted the issue immediately (34%)

• Had someone on ministry team/board/staff deal with the issue (15%)

• Looked for Scripture to address, solve the problem (14%)

• Sought counsel from someone I trusted (10%)

• Talked with the person (9%)

• Confronted the issue eventually (9%)

• Addressed it from the pulpit/in a sermon (4%)

• Had a council meeting/board meeting (2%)

• Self-examination (2%)

Survey research in general shows how people want to be perceived and may not always reflect an objective reality. Nevertheless, this provides a snapshot of how pastors perceive themselves responding to issues.

These and the other responses I've observed can be combined into several helpful categories. Let me use some animal characteristics to highlight the implications of these responses (but please don't press the metaphors too far).

The Sloth: stay detached

Several years ago I took our family to Georgia's Callaway Gardens to visit the Day Butterfly Center. Inside a large, temperature-controlled glass building, visitors walk along paths to enjoy butterflies that fly around freely and even land on people. I enjoyed our excursion, but what interested me most was the challenge given by one of the guides: "Look up in the trees and see if you can find the sloth." After half an hour, I finally spotted him clinging to a branch about twenty feet above my head.

A placard explained that sloths rarely move and only come down to poop. "Passive, detached, and unaware" best describes them.

Some pastors respond similarly to ministry frustration. In the survey, when added together, the categories "did nothing," "no problems/disappointments," and "not sure" equaled 13 percent. Among pastors, more than one in ten defaults to an unhealthy disregard for—or detachment from—a potential ministry killer. If you're in this group, I hope you'll own up to your responses to frustrations, even if you deny you have any.

The Skunk: leave the mess to others

One weekday morning as I arrived at church, I parked my truck about 50 feet from the door and began walking. About ten feet from the building, I noticed something. At first thought it was a cat. Then I saw it actually was a full-grown skunk that noticed me too.

I froze in my tracks, but he slowly lifted his tail as our eyes locked. As I edged away I claimed the promise of Psalm 91:10—"There shall no evil befall thee, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling."

I didn't exactly quote that, but I sure was namin', claimin', and prayin'. After the skunk saw I was giving him his space, he sauntered off without incident.

Had God not answered my prayer (or had I not moved back), the skunk scent would have made me a very unpopular pastor for a few days. Again, don't press the image too far, but some pastors respond to their frustrations by handing off their stinky issues to somebody else (see the third-largest category at 15 percent). Certainly in some cases we should delegate problems to others. But other times we delegate to avoid uncomfortable conflict we rightfully should face ourselves. When we do, we truly are missing opportunities God is giving us to grow.

The Hawk: look through a window, not in a mirror

On my way to the gym each day, I drive by a large open field. Often I see a hawk perched on a telephone pole, staring out into that field. I'm no ornithologist, but I know hawks have keen eyesight and love to eat mice. They constantly look for unsuspecting prey.

In the research, one tiny statistic revealed a most disconcerting discovery. Down the list of responses to ministry frustrations, number ten was "self-examination."

Only two out of a hundred pastors responded to their frustrations by looking at themselves as contributing to the problem.

Like the hawk, many of us keenly look outward but don't peer inward to see how we may be complicit in our struggles.

David Kinnaman, writing about the research, said: "Leaders exhibit very limited capacity or willingness to self-examine. This is not entirely unexpected; it's human nature. Yet pastors rarely suggested that they look inward as part of their solution to challenges.

"Virtually none of the 615 leaders we interviewed said that their frustration or disappointment is that they can't lead their people better—or considered that the commitment vacuum displayed by their congregants might somehow be a reflection of inadequate leadership."

This reminded me of an insight taught by Jim Collins, who uses a mirror and a window as metaphors to teach a quality of great leaders.

Superb leaders don't look out the window to blame others. They look in a mirror to take ownership when things don't go well. They look out a window to praise others when things do go well.

Ignoring this could easily become a ministry killer as others begin to see us either as blamers or as shirkers.

The Turtle: hide behind spirituality

I love turtles, especially box turtles. I've probably saved half a dozen from getting pancaked when I've pulled over and jumped out of my car to rescue one ambling across a road. I even kept a pet box turtle in my backyard when I was 40 years old. I used the excuse that it was my son's.

Any kid who's ever had a box turtle knows what it does when you pick it up: It instantly pulls its head and legs into its shell to hide. In similar fashion, sometimes we pastors duck our frustration by retreating into our spiritual shells. At first blush, the 37 percent who prayed about their frustrations look quite spiritual. But at times prayer can become an excuse to avoid dealing with issues at hand. When "pray about the issue" is combined with "look for Scripture to address/solve the problem," the percentage jumps to over 50 percent who choose private spiritual means as their default response.

I laud pastors who do this. However, a deeper look reveals something else. The Barna Group's written analysis noted: "The clear picture that emerges from this is that pastors generally solve problems with one extreme or another—either through 'human' effort to confront the problem, or through 'super-spiritualizing' the issue—but rarely through both. Many pastors 'hide' behind prayer …."

The Lion: comfortable in my own skin

We give lions an honored position: "King of the Jungle." I understand why; I've had a lot of experience with the behavior of lions. (Well, I watch The Discovery Channel, and I saw Lion King twice.) Although I've never personally encountered one, I know lions roar a lot, exude self-confidence, lie around a bunch, and usually get their way. As a leader I hope I exude appropriate self-confidence. And I do like getting my way.

Over a third of the pastors indicated that when faced with frustration, they immediately confront the issue. Although some issues do warrant a quick, self-confident response, many should lead to a more thoughtful and deliberate approach. Unfortunately, we may over-lean on our strength, as the researcher's analysis noted. "Many pastors … are a little too comfortable in their skin, without relying on prayer and self-examination to give spiritual context to their confrontations."

Although I tend to be a turtle by handling my hurt in private and in prayer, I've also roared too quickly at someone who ticked me off. I've verbally fired back in defensiveness at someone who criticized me, or shot back an instant email only to regret it later. Moses, reacting in anger, murdered an Egyptian, and then looked over his shoulder for the next 40 years.

Healthy hybrid of lion and turtle?

Since the research indicates most of us respond to frustration with one of two extremes, can we achieve a healthier balance? Granted, it's tough to respond appropriately in the moment. Sometimes we should just pull away, pray, and believe that love will cover a multitude of sins. If we're too quick to respond, we may miss the gentle voice of God's Spirit tempering our response. But prayer should never become an excuse to shirk conflict, and sometimes we must quickly confront an issue before it gets out of control.

The Barna Group's analysis also observed: "A surprisingly small percentage said they both prayed and confronted the problem right away—a dual-pronged approach that was identified by just 11 percent of pastors. Even if we are generous in our definition and include any pastor who confronted the problem eventually or 'talked with the person,' only 14 percent of all pastors said they did this type of face-to-face interaction along with prayer."

Kinnaman summarized well this tension between the lion and turtle responses: "Prayer is great, but is it a means to hear from the Holy Spirit or a way to delay a decision or a confrontation? I think it's interesting that many pastors are likely to suggest passive or even passive-aggressive methods of dealing with interpersonal problems. And many of those who say they confront something immediately do so without prayer, Scripture guidance, or input from advisors. In other words, few pastors follow a biblical process of dealing with conflict."

I don't want to unduly criticize pastors. I am one! Probably no other vocation places a greater expectation on a leader to balance confrontation and self-confidence with spiritual restraint and humility.

We're under constant scrutiny. Intentionally or unintentionally, people develop higher standards for us than they do for themselves. Often they expect us to be faultless, yet we know we can never perfectly handle our frustrations.

Ministry tension comes with the territory and will never go away this side of heaven. What bothers us and how we respond should clue us in to what saps our joy and energy. If we want to stay healthy and productive for the long haul, we must pay close attention to how we respond, take full responsibility when we err, and seek to always honor Christ.

_____

Relates post: 9 Signs your Hormones may be Hijacking your Leadership

Change is everywhere. And unless a church creates healthy change in itself, it will soon become obsolete. Numerous empty or almost empty churches in Europe and America's inner cities bear witness to that.

Ronald Heifetz, a Harvard professor and business/leadership author, is most known for a concept called adaptive change/leadership. Essentially adaptive change (and leadership) requires not cosmetic, familiar, or known solutions to existing problems (called technical change). Rather it requires experimentation, change of perspective, developing new values, and deep change from within. This link summarizes the differences between adaptive change and technical change.

In an article in the Harvard Business Review, Dr. Heifetz describes the three key steps British Airways took in the 1990's that transformed it from the airline nicknamed "Bloody Awful" to "The World's Favourite Airline."

The president at the time took the company through these three steps, applicable for churches faced with change.

1. They really listened to people inside and outside the organization.
2. They saw conflict as clues, or symptoms of what needed deep change.
3. The leadership held up the mirror to themselves, recognizing that they embodied the changes that they needed to made in the company.

Looming over six feet tall with a scraggly beard, wire-rimmed glasses, a 12 inch ponytail tied with a rubber band, and a vest dotted with military patches, George would be at home riding a Harley with a motorcycle gang.

Instead, he holds a clear plastic jug plastered with yellow smiley-face stickers and filled with dollar bills. And he enthusiastically says, "Welcome to Wal-Mart. Have fun! Want a sticker?"

George is my favorite Wal-Mart greeter.

My second favorite is Jimmy. Unlike George who stands, Jimmy sits...in his motorized wheel-chair. His physical disability keeps him from standing or even holding one of those charity jugs. Yet, with the same exuberance, he makes you feel good with his, "Welcome to Wal-Mart. Thanks for coming."

I don't know how well the following statement would hold up under a scientific study, but I believe it to be true. Shoppers who meet George and Jimmy as they arrive buy more stuff at Wal-Mart than those who meet other greeters who, for the sake of not being too harsh, come across with much less enthusiasm.

Both George and Jimmy use their leadership mirror well.

What is a leadership mirror? It's a concept rooted in science and in the bible.

In 1995 an Italian neuroscientist  discovered what are called 'mirror neurons' in our brain. Essentially, a part of our brain lights up when we sense intention behind another's action. When that part of our brain turns on, we feel a connection to that person. Their actions activate our mirror neurons. For example, when someone smiles at us, it drives the same motor response on my face. We smile. That experience then sends signals to our emotional center so that we share a positive emotion with the person. The strongest emotions we portray ripple out to others, whether those emotions are good or bad.

Before scientists discovered these mirror neurons, the bible already had. Remember what the writer of Proverbs wrote?

Prov. 15.1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. 

That explains that if when I go to Wal-Mart and either George or Jimmy is on duty that day, I have a better experience shopping. They have used their leadership mirror well, even though they probably don't even know it. Their body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice have become a mirror to me that I subconsciously reflect back to them which in turn affects my behavior and emotions.

This concept profoundly impacts our ability to lead as well. When we use our leadership mirror effectively, team attitudes and performance improves. When we don't, the opposite occurs. Just think about how you feel the next time you go to Wal-Mart and encounter a dumpy, negative, sleepy-faced greeter versus a George or a Jimmy greeter.

Consider these questions and ask yourself if you need to polish your leadership mirror.

1. Am I keenly aware of how I come across to those I lead with my body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice?
2. Do I consistently portray a positive upbeat tone to others?
3. What is my default facial expression... a scowl or a smile?
4. Do I consistently show up the same way each day at the office or do I leave people asking, "I wonder which boss is showing up today, the mad, sad, or happy one?"
5. Do I attempt to truly be present with others in the moment or do yesterday's events, today's task list, and tomorrow's problems distract me from fully engaged interactions?

If we as leaders pay a bit more attention to our leadership mirror and use it well, we not only can increase team performance, but can actually bless those on our team as we help them activate their mirror neurons for the good.

Lately, how have you used your leadership mirror?

Related post: How's your Leadership Character? 8 Indispensable Qualities.

God gave us this magnificent creation called the brain.Weighing less than three pounds, it wields incredible influence over how well leaders lead. Although we usually call the brain a computer, it's more like a pharmacy that constantly dispenses drugs (hormones) into our bodies which affects our emotions, our thinking, and our leadership

Dr. David Rock, recognized as one of the leading spokesmen in a new field called neuroleadership wrote the book Your Brain at Work. In it he winsomely describes how the brain works and how it affects leadership. I hightly recommend this book to all leaders, especially pastors.

Essentially, neuroleadership describes how brain function relates to leadership.

Brain researchers have discovered that sustained high levels of hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline affect our ability to think clearly, creatively, and decisively, thus diminishing our ability to lead most effectively.

And how do sustained high levels of these hormones get into our system?

They get there from chronic anxiety, when we face long-term stress. It's akin to a car accelerator getting stuck and revving at high rpm's for a long period of time. If it continues, the engine will wear out prematurely. In the same way, when leaders and pastors stay stressed 24/7, our anxiety, and thus our hormones, get stuck at a high level which dramatically reduces our ability to lead.

Take this simple assessment to discover how many chronic anxiety markers you currently see in your life.

1. I react and act impulsively when people disagree with me
2. I assume the worst and connect dots where there are none
3. I easily get defensive
4. I don't seem to be as creative as I once was
5. I often find myself in a mental and emotional fog
6. I lose perspective easily
7. I don’t listen well to others, not because I don't want to, but because my mind wanders
8. I find it difficult to concentrate
9. I find that others often mirror my defensiveness and reactiveness

Divert Daily

Withdraw Weekly

Abandon Annually

Recently I've been reading about a leadership concept called 'adaptive leadership.' I've just started an excellent book by Heifetz-Linsky-Grashow called The Practice of Adaptive Leadership. A great read.

One short article by Susan DeGenring on the subject lists 5 decisions great leaders must make. I've summarized them below. You can read the full article here.

• Shift focus and reframe your job from that of problem-solver, to that of developer of problem solvers.

• Give the work back to the people.

• Ask the important, and sometimes, tough questions, and don't give all the answers.

• Know how to help people learn, not by telling, but by understanding the perceptions, beliefs and values that drive their action, and help them plug into alternative, more agile ways of thinking.

• Accept that heartache is inevitable and courage is essential when you lead.

Related post: Leading in Turbulent Times.

I'm a leader. I pastor a church of over 1,000, lead a staff of 20, and lead a volunteer base of several hundred. As leaders we help those who follow us to accomplish goals, move forward into a preferred future, and make progress. Thus we often do a lot of telling.

We cast vision by telling

We craft strategies by telling

We set goals by telling

We recruit leaders by telling

We manage staff by telling

Our fast-paced world often tempts us to give quick answers. Followers expect good leaders to act decisive and quick answers can make us appear so.

Unfortunately, we can tell too much and miss one of the most amazing leadership tools: the well placed question.

This morning as I read Mark 2, I noticed a pattern in Jesus' response to those who questioned Him. That chapter records four unique questions posed to him. Three out of four times Jesus responded with at least one question. In those responses He didn't immediately tell them an answer to their question. Rather, He sought to make them think about what they asked by asking them a question.

When we build a culture into our churches and ministries that encourages questions, these benefits result.

1. We see reality more clearly. One more well-placed question may surface an important issue you otherwise might have missed.
2. Innovation. Questions can spur new ideas and solutions to problems.
3. Self-reflection. Simply telling someone an answer may stifle his/her need to think through the answer for himself.
4. Perspective. A good question can open up a fresh perspective to a perplexing dilemma.
5. Focus. Questions can help a group or person focus on the real issue.

However, when we use questions as we lead we must avoid these unhealthy patterns.

1. Defensiveness-using questions as a defense mechanism, a 'tit-for-tat' response.
2. Aloofness-using questions to avoid answering a valid question because you think it is beneath you to answer.
3. Ignorance-not answering a valid question about which you have no knowledge in order to hide your lack of knowledge. In that case it's best to say, "I don't know."
4. Controlling-using questions to put another into a corner to embarrass him or shut him down.
5. Deflecting-using questions to move a valid conversation to another subject.

Asking questions can become a potent tool in our leadership toolbox.

How have you used questions in your leadership?

Related post: 5 Questions to Help You Clarify Your Leadership Strengths

OR

I love Henry Nouwen. When you read his books you realize this man walked with God and oozed wisdom. I ran across this quote that caused me to think about my leadership.

"There is within you a lamb and a lion. Spiritual maturity is the ability to let lamb and lion lie down together. Your lion is your adult, aggressive self. It is your initiative-taking and decision-making self. But there is also your fearful, vulnerable lamb, the part of you that needs affection, support, affirmation, and nurturing. When you heed only your lion, you will find yourself overextended and exhausted. When you take notice of only your lamb, you will easily become a victim of your need for other people's attention.

The art of spiritual living is to fully claim both your lion and your lamb. Then you can act assertively without desiring your own needs. And you can ask for affection and care without betraying your talent to offer leadership. Developing your identity as a child of God in no way means giving up your responsibilities. Likewise, claiming your adult self in no way means that you cannot become increasingly a child of God. In fact, the opposite is true. The more you can feel safe as a child of God, the freer you will be to claim your mission in the world as a responsible human being. And the more you claim you have a unique task to fulfill for God, the more open you will be to letting your deepest need be met.

The Kingdom of peace that Jesus came to establish begins when your lion and your lamb can freely and fearlessly lie down together."

Henri J. M. Nouwen, The Dance of Life: Weaving Sorrows and Blessing into One Joyful Step, ed. Michael Ford (Notre Dame, IN: Ava Maria press, 2005), 156.

When I read this quote, I asked myself which do I neglect, the lion or the lamb. How about you?

Related post: What Pastors should look for in Safe People

Kevin Cashman wrote a great book every leader should read, Leadership from the Inside Out: Becoming a Leader for Life. Essentially he challenges leaders to lead from character (the inside). If you've not read it, I highly recommend it.

In an early chapter he lists several questions that can help clarify where our leadership strengths lie. I've adapted his questions into five below. Read these questions slowly and reflectively.

1. What would your dearest friend say in moment of deep admiration of you?
2. When you feel energized and fully alive, what strengths and traits do you exercise?
3. What circumstances bring out your strongest character traits?
4. What experiences in your life have caused you to feel most completely yourself?
5. If you witnessed your funeral, what do you hope people would say about your life?

When we discover, develop, and deploy our strengths and gifts, we maximize our Kingdom impact and experience the greatest joy.

Are you leading from the inside out?

Related post: Guilt Producing Questions Pastors Secretly Ask Themselves

Although I’m not a physician, as a pastor I’ve learned a lot about the brain through my youngest daughter’s five brain surgeries. Imagine a tootsie roll pop with two centers. Pretend the inner center is a sweet tart surrounded by the gooey tootsie roll that in turn is surrounded by the hard outer candy. Our brains include three parts, like our imaginary tootsie roll pop.

The inner core, called the reptilian brain regulates such functions as circulation and respiration. It’s on automatic pilot. Let’s say you’re sensitive to criticism about your preaching and in a conversation one of your leaders makes this comment. “I sure wish you’d go deeper with your Bible teaching. I’ve talked to a lot of people who are thinking about leaving because they aren’t getting fed.” I don’t think I’ve ever met a pastor or any leader who hasn’t heard a comment like that. If you’ve allowed chronic anxiety to build up inside, you might immediately react without thinking by sarcastically blurting, “I’m doing my best and if they want to leave, I’d be happy for them and me.” Such a comment threatens you and you adapt to this threat from the automatic process of the reptilian part of your brain.

The second part of our brains (the gooey tootsie roll part), the mammalian brain, regulates other functions such as bonding, playing, nurturing and expressions like shock, sorrow, and rejoicing. It also plays a role between pleasure and pain, flight and fight, and tension and relaxation. It serves as the seat of emotion. However, sometimes instead of maintaining balance between our reptilian brain and the third layer (the seat of rational thought), this part of the brain goes haywire. A pastor who enjoys preaching and has seen fruit from it, after enough critical comments, might face a depressive funk that his ministry is fruitless and that he should quit.

Both the reptilian and the mammalian parts of our brain compose about 15%, operate on automatic pilot, and have many connecting neurons. However, our cerebral cortex, the outer brain, encompasses 85% of our brain. At this level God has given us the ability to think, process, gain insight, and choose. It is the seat of intentionality whereas the other two parts are the seats of instinct.

In summary, three brain parts compose our Brain:

Lizard brain (reptilian): on automatic pilot that acts without thinking. Lizards eat their young. Some churches eat their pastors

'Puppy' brain (mammilian): the seat of emotions, also somewhat on automatic pilot

Main brain (neocortex): the place where we think, analyze, choose, create, symbolize, and observe.

God gave us the two lower brain levels. They aren’t inferior, but limited. The neocortex can’t ignore them or else life would be rather dull. However, the neocortex allows us to “reflect on what is happening (insight) and plan for what might happen (foresight).”[1]

When anxiety overwhelms us, we react and these processes take over.

• Impulse overwhelms intention
• Instinct sweeps aside imagination
• Reflexive behavior closes off reflective thought
• Defensive postures block out defined positions
• Emotional reactivity limits clearly determined direction.[2]

Several years ago in an elder’s meeting in our conference room, one of the elders made a statement that implied I lacked a certain competency in my role indicated by something I did. I don’t even remember the specific issue, but I clearly remember my reaction. When he made that statement, I impulsively blurted, “I do not do  that (whatever it was)!” He retorted, “You do it all the time.” I immediately jumped out of my chair, stomped over to the sink area behind me, and in anger said, “I never can please you. Everything I do is just not enough for you, is it?”

For the next ten minutes we went back and forth and it took the finesse of another elder to cool us down.

What happened? I had experienced chronic anxiety toward this elder for some time. And, our elder meetings had gone that well. When I felt attacked, my reptile brain took over. My emotional reactivity came out as impulsive defensiveness. It happened without me even thinking.

In retrospect, I should have paused and allowed the thinking side of my brain rule instead of my emotional side.  My emotions acted faster than my thinking. I didn’t handle my feelings responsibly. I lost objectivity and civility. My unhealthy drivenness to please this leader caused an unnecessary conflict. In reality, his comment probably carried at least a grain of truth in it. Had I been more thoughtful, self-aware, and less anxiety filled anxiety that I had disappointed this leader, the conversation could have turned in a constructive direction. Fortunately, we both cooled down and I apologized for my reacting.

From which brain do you lead when under stress?

Related posts:

• 8 indicators your ministry may be drowning you
• Neuroleadership Clues to Tiger Wood's Meltdown
• 9 Signs Hormones May be Hijacking your Leadership

[1] Peter I. Steinke, How Your Church Family Works: Understanding Congregations as Emotional Systems (Herndon, VA: The Alban Institute), Kindle e-book, locations 313-325.

[2] Ibid, locations 325-334.

I'm currently in a coaching relationship with seven other pastors through Will Mancini's organization, Auxano. It's a great experience and I highly recommend it to pastors who want to get clear on their vision and want to lead their churches well.

In Will's seminal book on how to capture and lead through vision, Church Unique, he lists 9 benefits of being clear as you lead your church.

Here's why he says we must lead with clarity.

1. Clarity makes uniqueness undeniable
2. Clarity makes direction unquestionable
3. Clarity makes enthusiasm transferable
4. Clarity makes work meaningful
5. Clarity makes synergy possible
6. Clarity makes success definable
7. Clarity makes focus sustainable
8. Clarity makes leadership credible
9. Clarity makes uncertainty approachable

How would you rank your clarity using these 9 as a benchmark?

Related post:  Strategic Planning for Dummies

As a Pastor, if you lead, you will face turbulence in your ministry or organization.

One of the most revered men in history, King David, constantly faced turbulence as he led. When King Saul died, Israel faced a leadership future fraught with obstacles.

I Chronicles 12 describes how many groups stepped up to help David make this transition. The Scriptures describe one group, the men of Issachar, in this way.

(they) understood the times and knew what Israel should do — 200 chiefs, with all their relatives under their command.... (v. 32)

All these were fighting men who volunteered to serve in the ranks. They came to Hebron fully determined to make David king over all Israel. (v. 38)

This group modeled what every leader and pastor must live during turbulent times.

As leaders and pastors, the 4 four essentials we must model in turbulent times, as did the men of Issachar, are...

1. Define reality
2. Shape your vision
3. Develop a coherent strategy
4. Implement your strategy with passion and courage

Related post: 8 decisions leaders should make during a crisis

I just read A Failure of Nerve by Edwin H. Friedman. This is one of the best books I’ve ever read on leadership. It’s a slow read, but worth it.

The author was a Jewish counselor who wrote extensively on a counseling philosophy called Bowen Family Systems. The more I read about this way of looking at church leadership through ’systems’ eyes, the more I wish I had understood these principles 25 years ago. It would have saved me a lot of angst.

Friedman lists these 8 principles that leaders should practice when facing a crisis. I’ve paraphrased them here.

1. Don’t let the crisis become the axis around which your world revolves.
2. Develop a support system outside of your church such as counselors or other pastors.
3. Stay focused on long-term goals.
4. Practice spiritual disciplines.
5. Listen to your body.
6. Work out the balance between being responsible for yourself and being seen as difficult and self-centered.
7. Use humor.
8. It’s time to make decisions when the same question brings no new informati0n.

Kevin Cashman wrote the book Leadership from the Inside Out: Becoming a Leader for Life. I highly recommend it. I'm reading it for a second time.

In one chapter he writes about managing change in an organization. His change mastery  shifts below apply to church leadership as well.

1. Focus on Opportunities vs. Problems
2. Focus on Long Term vs Short Term (don't lost sight of your long-term vision in the midst of change)
3. Focus on Purpose vs. Circumstance (keep focused on your and your church's purpose and values to avoid being mired in difficult circumstances)
4. Focus on Adaptability vs Control (control will only yield a certain degree of results; good leaders must remain agile, flexible, and innovative to sustain results over the long haul)
5. Focus on Service vs. Self (serve your leaders during the stress of change)
6. Focus on Listening vs. Expertise (effective leaders stay open and practice authentic listening to stay connected to others and to remain open to other innovative solutions)

Other related posts:

• Etch-a-sketch Church Planning

For more Help and Resources for Discouraged Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

In the book First, Break all the Rules, by Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman, they list 12 core questions Gallup discovered that, when asked, give organizations the information they need to attract, focus, and keep the most talented employees.

Pastors and church leaders would do well to regularly ask their employees to answer them.

For more Leadership Resources for Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

Kevin Cashman wrote an outstanding book on leadership called Leadership from the Inside Out: Becoming a Leader for Life. I'm reading it a second time.

In his book he writes about conscious beliefs and shadow beliefs. He defines a shadow belief as a belief we hold deep inside, outside of our conscious awareness. He contends that these beliefs often hinder leaders from being their best. For example, one shadow belief might be that subtle voice inside that constantly says, "You must perform better than everybody else for people to like you." For me, one shadow belief I discovered was this: "Everybody around me needs to be happy for me to be happy. Therefore, I must try to make everybody happy." That belief stifled my joy and peace as I tried to lead our church.

Cashman says, however, that we must bring those shadow beliefs into the light so that we can become our best as leaders. He gives seven clues that can bring these shadow beliefs to light.

1. If other people often give us feedback inconsistent with how we see ourselves, a shadow is present.
2. When we feel stuck or blocked with a real loss as to what to do next, a shadow is holding us back.
3. As strengths become counterproductive, some hidden dynamics need to surface.
4. When are are not open to new information, new learning, or other people's views, a shadow is limiting us.
5. If we react to circumstances with emotional responses disproportionate to the situation, we are right over the target of a shadow belief.
6. When we find ourselves forcefully reacting to the limitations of others in a critical, judgemental way, we are often projecting our shadow onto others.
7. If we often experience pain, trauma, or discomfort in our body, a shadow belief may be attempting to rise to the surface to seek reconciliation.

As I've faced my shadow beliefs, I've experienced greater peace in my life and become a more productive leader.

How about you? Are any shadow beliefs dogging your leadership?

Related posts: 3 Simple Questions When Leading in the Moment

For more Pastor Resources and Help, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

My wife and I just returned from a conference in Bogota, Colombia where we taught pastors and their wives. We were privileged to serve with Juan Carlos Flores Zúñiga and his wife Orietta who arranged the conference through his organization. Lance Witt and his wife Connie were also on the teaching team. He served as the executive pastor at Saddleback for several years and now leads his own ministry. Vicente Castillo, a pastor from Mexico also taught.

We served over 75 pastors and their spouses and it was a humbling experience. These gracious people reminded me of 4 crucial leadership principles.

1. Leaders who grow must must cultivate a hunger to keep growing. I was amazed at how these pastors took prodigious notes as I spoke. Their desire to learn was palpable.
2. Godly leaders embody an attitude of gratitude. Although all the pastors showed appreciation, one brought tears to my eyes. He said many years ago an American missionary gave him a small new testament. That small bible became instrumental in his conversion. He said with great joy, "God bless America." He viewed America as a tool in God's hand to point him to Jesus.
3. The best leaders never stop sacrificing for the greater cause of the Kingdom. I learned that many of these pastors left good paying jobs as engineers, business executives, and other professional vocations to serve Christ full-time. Unfortunately, in America we are tempted to settle into a comfortable life-style in ministry and forget Jesus' call to continual sacrifice.
4. God uses leaders who show child-like faith. I sat in a restaurant and listened to a pastor's wife tell story after story how God had miraculously provided for them. She described God's work with such freshness and enthusiasm that the Lord convicted me of my sometimes lack of this kind of faith.

Leaders must constantly remind themselves that these four principles really matter to God. And, He uses the most unlikely people and places to remind us, as He did for me.

For more Help and Resources for Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

Last week I attended Willow Creek's Leadership Summit at a local video venue. As usual, the speaker line-up was superb.

I used my iPad to capture my learnings and these these seven stood out.

1. We can hear the whispers from God when we lower the ambient noise in our lives. Bill Hybels, The Power of the Whisper
2. In leadership conversations, what is your question to statement's ratio? We should be asking more questions. We spend too much time being interesting than being interested. Jim Collins, How the Mighty Fall
3. No one has to be forced to do what they are passionate about. Christine Caine
4. Don't let the devil ride because he is going to want to drive. Adam Hamilton
5. Complaints arrive as unappointed guests. They resist eviction. Trust evicts complaints. Jeff Manion, When Christians get it Wrong
6. The carrot and stick approach to motivation works for simple tasks but not for tasks that require creativity. Daniel Pink, author of Drive.
7. We spend too much time trying to change the bottom (meaning that we focus too much on trying to change non-performers). Jack Welch, author of Winning.

Jim Collins told us that he had lots of free stuff on his web site. He was right. Check it out and you'll find some great free stuff for leaders.

If you'd like a free chapter of my latest book, 5 Ministry Killers and How to Defeat Them, endorsed by Ed Stetzer, you can get one here. It's based on what I learned from a study of 2,000 pastors I commissioned Lifeway Research, Barna Research, and Christianity Today to do for the book.

For more Help and Resources for Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

I commissioned Barna Research, Lifeway Research, and Christianity Today to survey almost 2,000 pastors to discover what issues can cause a ministry or a leader's passion for ministry to die. I based my latest book on those findings. You can download a free chapter of the book here.

It would do us well to heed Socrates wise advice when he wrote, "Know thyself."

For more Help and Resources to overcome Pastoral Burnout, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

Leaders need healthy feedback to lead well. An excellent process, a 360 assessment, has helped me grow in several areas.

Simply put, as the diagram pictures, a 360 assessment seeks input from your peers, your supervisor, your subordinates, and a few others.

I've had two 360's done on me, one very extensive, and one very simple that I recommend to other pastors and spiritual leaders.

Recently, the simple assessment gave each of our staff pastors 1 to 3 growth areas on which to focus. One of mine was to make sure that when I talked to other leaders, I would put myself in their shoes and ask, "Would I feel loved at this moment." I'm a task guy, and this simple learning has helped me focus more on building relationships.

Here's the process we used in the simple 360 assessment.

1. I asked each pastor to give me the names of a few of their leaders who they'd want to receive constructive input.
2. I compiled this list and added a few more.
3. We sent three questions to each of these people and asked them to honesty answer the questions.
4. We kept them anonymous by sending the responses to one leader not on staff who compiled the responses.
5. I and one of our elders (a psychologist) compiled themes out of the responses. We also culled any hurtful comments or those that had no true bearing on leadership growth.
6. I met with each pastor and shared the themes we discovered (usually 1-3 areas on which to focus).
7. Each pastor then selected 2 people in his ministry orbit with whom he would share his growth areas and ask for regular accountability.

The end result? A way to address growth areas in a positive and proactive way.

Below you'll find the email we sent to those we asked to evaluate.

Dear name,

As part of our annual review process we are collecting information about the potential and performance of our staff pastors. You are one of several chosen either by the pastor being evaluated or by me.

Would you please help by giving us your candid feedback, with truth and love, to the questions below?

The answers you give will not be presented verbatim to the pastor, nor will the pastor know who made any specific comment. The responses will be kept anonymous.  After the responses are received (around six respondents per pastor) name (the psychologist) and I will group them into themes.  Then I and one of the other elders will perform the annual review with that pastor along with a self-review each pastor will do on himself.

We want to serve our church with our best.  I will also participate by having the pastors, elders, and deacons anonymously answer the same questions about me.

Here are the questions:

1. What’s going well under name's leadership?

2. What’s not going well under name's leadership?

3. What’s missing under name's leadership?

Please respond with your answers to the email address below within the next five days. Name (the objective leader) will receive them and remove your name to keep them totally anonymous.

Healthy evaluation and feedback can become a tremendous tool to lift our leadership game. I encourage you to use a 360 assessment with your staff. It may feel a bit scary before it's done. But if done well, you and your leaders will profit from the experience.

Related posts:

• When Someone Screws Up: reprimand or look for the proper moment
• Making the most of the next 10 years: a simple evaluation

For more Help and Resources for Discouraged Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

Sometimes we can view leadership as simply big-picture, long-term, and strategic, especially if we lead organizations such as a church or a non-profit.

I've learned, however, that how I treat one-on-one encounters with leaders can impact the leader and the organization often in greater ways than my big-picture leadership.

Here are three questions to silently ask ourselves when with another leader.

1. If I were in his/her shoes, would this leader feel loved?
2. What does this leader need from me now and how can I meet it?
3. What is God doing in this person's life and how does He want me to help?

Perhaps these questions are ways to live out the maxim, "people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."

Do you silently ask yourself any questions that help you one-on-one lead?

For more Leadership Resources for Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

Recently Leadership Network asked 40 pastors (including the likes of Wayne Cordeiro and Elmer Towns) to explain in 6 minutes what they wish they had done differently in ministry. They held an online conference called SAGE.

As one of the speakers, I spoke on why I wish I was less like a turtle.

You can read an article that Leadership Journal posted, Animal Instincts, taken from my book 5 Ministry Killers and How to Defeat Them that unpacks this concept in more detail.

Do your ever find yourself responding like this to ministry's challenges?

CS Leadership from Ginger Creek Community Church on Vimeo.

For more Resources, Tips and Help for Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

I just spent ten days with my family on vacation in the Bahamas in a condo literally steps from the beach. The snorkeling was dazzling, even better than snorkeling in Hawaii two years ago. I saw over two dozen varieties of fish, excluding the nurse sharks, dolphins, and a giant starfish I found.

My experience with three specific fish reminded me that we leaders must keep certain principle in mind when we select other leaders to serve in our ministries or serve on staff.

One day we took a powerboat trip to a private island in the Exumas, a collection of islands in the Bahamas. The experience included feeding grapes to threatened iguanas and fish slivers to giant stingrays. The highlight was when the tour guides fed grouper carcasses to lemon sharks and reef sharks, as we stood a mere ten feet away.

Schools of triangular-shaped silver fish about the size of saucers swam a few feet from the shore. They kept their distance, though. After our broiled grouper lunch, I decided to try an experiment. I put on my goggles, took two hotdog buns, and waded out into the water. I pinched off small bits of the bun and dropped them a foot in front of me while I was under water. A feeding frenzy ensued reminiscent of a piranas' attack.

As long as I gave them hotdog buns, they stuck around. But once I ran out, they scattered. Here's the principle I learned from these fish.

1. Shy away from prospective leaders who just want a piece of you. These people are mostly takers.

I often snorkeled in a reef about two hundred yards east of the beach in front of our condo. One day as I swam there, the reef shelf suddenly dropped from four to over ten feet. It carved the reef into a horseshoe-shaped mini-lagoon. I looked to my left and saw the most beautiful fish I had ever seen, a lion fish about a foot long. Unlike most fish, when I dove down toward it, it wasn't frightened. For ten minutes I snorkeled about two feet from this magnificent fish. I felt like the fish whisperer and that I and the fish were one. :)

When I got back to the condo, I told my daughter what I had seen and she exclaimed, "Dad, I think that fish was a lion fish. It's poisonous!" I responded, "No it's not." I then googled 'lion fish' and the picture in Wikapedia (shown here) included this caption: "The lion fish's attack posture.'" As I read further, I learned that if you touched one of its spines you'd experience severe headaches, vomiting, and difficulty breathing and would require immediate emergency medical attention.

I had been so enthralled with the fish's beauty that I almost put myself in a dangerous situation because I didn't know enough about the species. Here's the second principle I learned from the lion fish.

2. Carefully vet those who dazzle you with the first impression they make on you. First impressions can deceive.

Call me stupid, but the next day I went to the same reef hoping to see the lion fish again. This time I wanted a picture, from a safe distance though. It wasn't there, but as I floated I noticed a piece of seaweed about the size of those large pencils carpenters use to mark wood. For some reason I kept looking at it and as my eyes focused on this floating 'seaweed' I realized it was a fish. From my elementary school days I remember seeing a picture of this species called a 'trumpet fish,' a relative of the seahorse.

I almost missed seeing this unique fish because it blended so well into the reef's background. Here's the third leadership selection principle.

3. Your best leader may be right in front of you. Often they won't stand out in a crowd (much like how David didn't 'look' like a king when God told Samuel to pick him).

So, the next time you face a leadership selection decision, consider these three principles.

What principles have helped you make good leader selections?

Other related posts:

• How to be a Secure Leader
• Are You a Catalytic Leader

For more Pastor Help and Resources, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

Israel’s second king, King David, poses a question about character in Psalm 15.1, “God, what do you look for in those who draw close to You?”

He them summarizes the answer in the first part of verse 2 with the words ‘blameless’ and ‘righteous.’ The NASB version uses the word ‘integrity’ for ‘blameless.’

Psa. 15.1 LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary? Who may live on your holy hill?  2 He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart 3 and has no slander on his tongue, who does his neighbor no wrong and casts no slur on his fellowman,  4 who despises a vile man but honors those who fear the LORD, who keeps his oath even when it hurts,  5 who lends his money without usury and does not accept a bribe against the innocent. He who does these things will never be shaken.

The verses that follow verse 1 describe a blameless-integrous-righteous person.

Take a moment and ask yourself if these qualities would accurately describe your leadership character. If not, what needs to change in you?

• I tell the truth. (v 2)
• I avoid gossip. (v 3)
• I protect the reputations of others. (v 3)
• I hate what God hates. (v 4)
• I show honor to the faithful. (v 4)
• I keep my word. (v 4)
• I’m fair with others. (v 5)
• I refuse to be manipulated. (v 5)

I love these this definition of sin from Susanne Wesley, the mother of Charles and John Wesley. We leaders would do well to heed her wisdom as we lead.

Whatever weakens your reason, impairs the tenderness of your conscience, obscures your sense of God, or takes off your relish of spiritual things; in short, whatever increases the strength and authority of your body over your mind, that thing is sin to you, however innocent it may be in itself.

For more Leadership Help and Resources for Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.

Do your best and leave the results to God.

That phrase may seem a bit worn, but it’s well worth heeding. In Christ’s parable of the talents, the master, representing God, gave responsibility to the servants, us, based on individual ability.[1] The story implies us that some pastors (and people)  have greater competencies than others. Similarly, Paul teaches that the Holy Spirit gives out gifts as He sees fit.[2] It’s obvious that the Spirit gives some pastors extra preaching or leading gifts, evidenced in the size and impact of their ministries.

It’s easy to become discouraged when we do our best yet don’t see our church grow like others to which we may compare ourselves. When we wrap our identities around numerical results and the numbers don’t increase, the discouragement can overwhelm. This is especially true for older pastors who realize they may never achieve the dreams they had for ministry.

Author David Goetz wrote,

I often sat in the studies of both small-church pastors and mega-church pastors, listening to their stories, their hopes, their plans for significance. I deduced, albeit unscientifically, that often clergymen in midlife had worse crises of limits than did other professionals. Religious professionals went into the ministry for the significance, to make an impact, called by God to make a difference with their lives. But when you’re fifty-three and serving a congregation of 250, you know, finally, you’ll never achieve the large-church immortality symbol, the glory that was promised to you. That can be a dark moment—or a dark couple of years.[3]

However, noted theologian Fred Rogers of Mr. Rogers fame recalled an experience he had when attending seminary. He wanted to hear a variety of preachers, so for a time each Sunday he visited different churches. One week he experienced “the most poorly crafted sermon [he] had ever heard.” A friend had accompanied him and when he turned to her, he found her in tears. She said, “It was exactly what I needed to hear.”

Rogers then told his audience, “That's when I realized that the space between someone doing the best he or she can and someone in need is holy ground. The Holy Spirit had transformed that feeble sermon for her—and as it turned out, for me too.”[4] Although the results from our best efforts may look feeble to some, they can touch a heart and change a life when we least expect it. This side of heaven we will never know the people we impacted through our faithful service.

This post was taken from my just released book, 5 Ministry Killers and How to Defeat Them by Bethany House Publishing.

[2] 1 Corinthians 12

[3] David L. Goetz, Death by Suburb (New York: HarperCollins, 2006), 43.

[4] In Victor Parachin, “8 Ways to Encourage Your Pastor,” Today’s Christian, Sept/Oct. 1999. http://www.christianitytoday.com/tc/1999/sepoct/9r5035.html?start=1.

For more Help, Resources and Books for Pastors, visit Pastor Stone’s main site.